Saturday, September 27, 2008

There is a thief at VCC. Hold onto your Pants.

(Note: Some names have been omitted to protect the innocent and facts have been embellished for general entertainment value.)

Last week, there was a fourth floor locker-break-in-crime spree. On Wednesday at noon, I arrived at my locker to find the lock missing. Fortunately, nothing had been stolen. I suppose the thief was interrupted. Two other lockers were broken into and the next day, there were three more. I consider this one of the luckiest weeks I've had, because my wallet was sitting in plain sight, just waiting to be snatched.

Unfortunately, one of my classmates (who has asked to remain anonymous) was not so blessed. On Monday, he did not have his locker broken into. Rather, he had his pants stolen!
Here is how the event unfolded:

It was a normal day in the Garde Manger kitchen: Sophiey was whistling, Zach was singing, and Seamus was considering the enormity of the universe. At around 10 a.m., our innocent peer noticed that there was a difference in classroom temperature. Had the extractor fans been turned on? Had someone finally managed to open a window to our hermetically sealed classroom. Whatever it was, he did not let it deter him from his task of creating six beautifully garnished, meat salads. However, when our hapless victim entered the walk-in fridge for some frisee, he couldn't help but notice that his nether regions felt like they were freezing. He shivered for a moment in thoughtful contemplation and it was then that he noticed, he had NO PANTS! In only a hat, chef's jacket, necktie, apron, and tighty-whities our classmate whisked up to the fourth floor and found a pair of black sport pants to wear. As harrowing as the experience was he did manage to complete his daily task and the students of VCC did have their meat salad. On Friday, he had to purchase a new pair of Chef's pants for $30.

So this is a warning to all the VCC students: Beware, there is a thief in a midst. So, watch your locker and definitely hold on to your pants.

3 comments:

Helen said...

Shouldn't that be "sight" and not "site"? ;-)

Anonymous said...

Why yes!
Thanks for the proof read catch.

Princess Inaka said...

beware of wayward theives at VCC my sister had her knives stolen when she went there. Keep your valuables close and your enemies closer...
Getting stoked about the parade of lost souls!